The Hard Work of Homeschool
"Why do you homeschool?"
This is a question that I have heard at least a dozen times since we made the move from Washington state. A question I haven't been accustomed to answering on a moments notice. First of all let me just say that the rebel in me wants to answer, “Because it’s my right!” But pride never gets me anywhere so I will concede. Second, I want to tell you what a silly question this is because we’re all homeschoolers! A school didn’t teach your child to walk, to speak or probably even how to hold a pencil. You did! You’ve probably taught your child how to love, apologize and be kind to their neighbors. You are homeschoolers my friends and you’re probably pretty darn good ones too! OK, hopping down from my soapbox now…
As I was saying, the question comes often here. It's understandable. We came from a state that reported over 33,000 homeschooled kids in 2015 to a state that is home to only 4,200 currently in 2017. In Washington, if you did not homeschool, surely you knew at least a few people who did. It was a widely accepted choice even by some of the most conservative of folks. Here in the heart of America, it's a much less common idea.
Families who homeschool in South Dakota are the strong, brave and independent type. Don't get me wrong. I believe all homeschooling requires a certain amount of <insanity> ahem, bravery. Here though, the atmosphere of either being "with us" or "against us" is thick and one's skin must be as well to endure the weight of judgment. If you ask one of these brave souls they will respond with a resounding praise of how much better the attitude in the state is now than in previous decades, but for a family who spent the last decade among the hippies of the forest. It's painful. I'm certainly NOT against you, I just want to educate my own children, beside you.
So I have found myself pondering the question...why do we homeschool? When we started we were on a completely different journey than we find ourselves today. We had a single rowdy boy who did not fit well in to the public school setting and strong desire to teach him to love the Lord first and foremost. While both of these statements are still true today we have learned a few things along the way and had the opportunity to refine our mission for homeschooling.
#1 We homeschool to teach our kids to love the Lord most and to keep Jesus at the center of their lives. Our classrooms, our churches, our youth leaders are not responsible for this task, we are. We mess up and have the opportunity to model confession and forgiveness, grace and mercy daily. We get to pray with them whenever the need arises, even in (especially in) the middle of a math lesson.
#2 We homeschool to teach our kids how to think, not what to think. We want our kids to be big thinkers, game-changers and leaders. We want our kids to find their own passions without being hindered what their peers may think. As such we attempt to teach our kids using the classical model of education. Along the same line of "Teach a man to fish"...if you can give a student the tools for learning they will be well equipped for any path they choose in life.
#3 We homeschool our kids because of the freedom it gives us, both in content and schedule. We can customize our leaning plan to match what the kids love. A child passionately desires to be a veterinarian? We learn to give injections to a goat, and maybe write a paper on it. When we land on a topic that we find interesting we have the freedom to pause and fully immerse ourselves in it. We also have more freedom for fun! When we went to Disneyland we could go the first week of public school and guess what! No lines! First sunny day in two weeks?...That's a day to go fishing! And freedom to pause for the really important things. During my mother's last years here on earth we took our work with us several times to travel across the country to spend weeks with her. More precious than gold, we had the time we needed to just be present with her and we would have found ourselves limited on any other schedule.
#4 We homeschool our kids for the sake of relationship. My mom was my dearest friend, yet we struggled so much with our relationship in my teen years. We lost so many years because I could hide so much from her. While we don't believe that homeschooling guarantees healthy relationships, it is because of homeschooling we have the time to truly nurture our relationships with our kids. We can see what is going on with them, often before it even happens. Our children come to us, rather than their peers with most of their hard questions and we are blessed to try and figure out the answers alongside them.
While I do not believe that homeschooling is the only option, it is the only option for us. I am grateful to live in a country where we can homeschool our kids. I'm grateful to spend my days learning beside my favorite people! Although we have had to answer the dreaded "But what about their socialization," question more than a few times we DO have this freedom. We will serve the Lord as we learn to navigate this homeschool journey in our new homeland. We will love the people He puts in our path and we will answer the questions all along the way.